So last night I was f**king my girlfriend and I flip her over and f**k her up the ass. Later we're sitting having a cigarette when she says, "you know it was pretty presumptuous of you to think you can just flip me over and f**k me up the ass." And I said, "presumptuous!? That's a pretty big word for a 5th grader."

Yo momma is so stupid, she has no job, five kids, and six weeks to live, due to the fact she spent all her money on cigarettes and now has lung cancer.

How do you confuse a blonde? Hit her over the head with a baseball bat until she has concussion

Boy: Hey girl see these arms? They are just dying to be wrapped around you! She stabs him dead End of story

Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off. Who was left? Repeat. Yeah.

Q: What's funnier than Women's Rights? A: Nothing.

I know you are but what am I? Gay.

The turd said crazy turd so many cows have ninety two ears and it walked away to the store and drank doors while juggling feces and racist jack-o-lanterns.

What did the boy say to his friend? nothing, they were both deaf

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What's worse than 1 bee sting ? 2 bee stings What's worse than 2 bee stings ? the holocaust what's worse than the holocaust ? 3 bee stings

Q: Why did Sally fall off the swing? A: How the heck would I know? I don't Sally.

If you place a dog next to a cow, they're not the same size

Q:Why did the boy drop his icecream? A: His arm was chopped off by a ninja

Whats the difference between a Corvette and 1000 dead babies? I don't have a Corvette in my garage.

What's even worse than getting a parking ticket on your birthday? Child molestation.

What do you do if a black man throws a gernade at you? You take the pin out, and throw it back.

There was a white kid named Tyrone.

What did the tooth brush say to the toothe paste? Minorities.

Roses are red, Metal is gray, Justin Beiber, is very gay

Why are bacon and eggs good. Because Toasters are silver

what did the boy with cancer get for christmas? i dont know he's jewish

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a toothpick

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? a new bike.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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