Q: A boy went to 7-11 and bought Coke instead of 7up. Why? A: I don't know

Why did the women cross the road? I dont know.. why? no clue.. why was she out of the kitchen

Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

Whats more painful than falling onto a sharp stone? Suffering the loss of your mother and newborn brother in a tragic car accident on your birthday.

What's better than winning the special Olympics? Getting laid at the special Olympics.

A bloke walks into a bar. He doesn't say 'ouch' because it was a public house and not a hard surfaced object as you may have thought initially

What do you get when you cross a peanut and a snake? peanutsnake

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. Except when I said muffins I meant Jews. .. I guess it really isn't that funny anymore.

Why couldn't the black man participate in the running category of the Olympics? Because he had no legs, he was referred to the Special Olympics, instead.

Why did Bob fall over? He was impaled by a narwhal. -BG

A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

What did one banana say to the other banana? Answer: It didnt say anything because bananas are inanimate objects, so it isn't humanly possible for a banana to speak.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Shark bait.

Mel Gibson and a Jew walk into a bar They proceed to have a pleasant conversation and both take taxis home

Q: Whats worse than dropping your ice cream? A: Dropping two ice creams. Q: Whats worse than dropping two ice creams? A: The Holocaust. Q: Whats worse than the Holocaust? A: Dropping three ice creams.

knock knock who's there? to to who? to whom*

Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

Why did the little girl go to the hospital?........................Beacuse she fell when trying to steal cookies out of the cookie jar on top of the fridge.

Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

what do you call a blonde with black hair? Artificial intelligence

What do you call a concentration camp with a mental disability? Auschwistic.

So yesterday i walked into a bar, so what?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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