when Life gives you lemons, make lemonade. So i made some lemonade. Turns out the lemons Kawazaki Life gave me were poisoned and i shortly die afterwards. i wouldve died cursing out her name but she was cute so i forgave her in my mind. and thus i die in peace.

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

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How many babies can you fit on a ferris wheel? None, babies aren't allowed to ride

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Why did the person name her OC telephone? I have no idea, please let me know why.

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ME NAME IS JEFF

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Why did the man lose the poker match in the jungle? He was playing a cheetah.

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I regret everything.....

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Why was Rebecca Black beaten with a pole when she sang Friday? It was Saturday

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LISTEN UP PEEPS, I'M GOING TO SHOW YOU MY PASSWORD.. just as shown on screen THIS IS IT: ******* YEP just as shown on screen

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How do you kill a blonde? There are a variety of methods, but I prefer a fine mix of insecure clowns and pepto-bismol.

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Why was 13 afraid of 27 Because 51 had an extra penis

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someone says they've been "dying laughing"... no they haven't; they're quite capable of still breathing and functioning in every day life.

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A cowboy rides into town and stays the weekend but then leaves on Wednesday, how is this possible? He was alive for the weekend and died on Sunday, his body left on Wednesday. Now get a job and be happy with your life.

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A Minister a Priest and a Rabi walk into a bar, they are not setting a very good example.

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A jew, a homosexuel and a black guy are on a plane. It crashes and they all die in horrible circumstances.

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Doctor: I regret to tell you that you have multi-personality disorder. Patient: Which one of us?

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What is purple and rhymes with apple? Nothing

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The $5.00 Foot-long at Subway's is actually $5.45 due to tax.

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yo mama so fat, she got more chins than china town

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Why did the white kid tear up while watching a segment on slavery? He got something in his eye.

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A jew goes into a church. Yolo.

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What do you call a terrorist on 9/11? A terrorist.

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Why a man without hands and without legs want to stay in a barrel? He actually doesn't, but is unable to get out of it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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