- Anti Joke

Q: What did Hitler say to the Rabbi? A: I don't like you.

A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism. "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

Why did the Jew hate bananas? He was deathly allergic to them.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped.

What would Micheal Jackson do if he were alive today? THRILLER! THRILLER! THRILLERS NIGHT!

Yo momma so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, No Professionals."

What did the millionaire say to the hobo? Hi there.

Nero, I have 30 million dollars left, lets split them and leave ground zero behind us, I know it would make me happy to share them with you.

What happened to the boy who wnt through puberty? He bacame a man. There is nothing funny about a perfectly normal expirience that everyone goes through wether they like it or not.

Two cows are standing in a field. One says to the other, 'Have you heard about this mad cow disease?' and the other says 'Good thing we're penguins.'

Q: how do you make a clean naz dance? A: put a lil boogy in it? NOOO SUCK IT!!!

Will nearis is here! Get it

Q. Why didn't the man tell his girlfriend about his big lottery win? A. Because it was none of her business.

Somebody has robbed your house, how do you gather evidence? Look for traces of watermelon or chicken bones.

A horse walks into a bar. It trips over a barstool, breaks it's leg, and is butchered and turned into canned dog food.

What did the underprivileged girl get for Christmas? Nothing because Santa Claus is a media generated holiday icon and the real St. Nicolas has been deceased for almost 700 years.

saw a free cat yesterday...it was dead on the side of the road

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For New Years I want to spend more time with my... Video Games

This Anti-Joke is funny. haha.

Knock knock. "Whose there?" "Dave" Oh alright Dave, two seconds I have got to unlock the door~looks for and finds keys and unlocks door~ Hello Dave, sorry mate not been out yet so not been out, come in.........

Yo mama so poor that she's having trouble making ends meet without government assistance.

Is your Alzheimers getting better? I have alzeimers?...

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff. What's not pink and fluffy? Rape.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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