Why can't helen keller drive? She never got her permit

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what did jake say to the priest? hmmm, salty

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Where did Susie go during the explosion? On her knees to catch it.

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Your mother is so heavy that she decided to try out nutrisystem

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Q: What cat walks on two feet? A: Garfield Q: What mouse walks on two feet? A: Mickey Mouse Q: What duck walks on two feet? A: Donald Duck? A: No, all ducks you dipshit.

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Why should children always be nice? Because the evil christmas demon KRAMPUS will rip their ears off, put them in a bag and beat them with a stick!

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A Stick!

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Roses are red My parents are dead I am Batman.

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what's the difference between 7 and 2? 5

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Two black guys walk into a bar the bartender says get out

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How did the retarded, blind child win the Special Olympics? He didn't, he died of terminal lung cancer the year before. R.I.P.

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Q: What did the tree say as he fell? A: Studies have shown plants in general do not have a voice box, thus making plants incapable of speaking.

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Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

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a lady says, " i cant stand this." Th guy next to her had his legs blown off and will never be able to stand again.

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A. What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew: B. Pizza's don't scream when you put them into a oven.

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I read my Uncle an anti-joke. He is still wondering why it made no sense to him.

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whats better than a girl getting hit by a car? a girl getting hit by a car with my dick in her

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A: What did the orphan get for christmas? Q: Nothing she doesn't have any parents

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What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Velcro

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Q: What do you get when a black man dates a white lady? A: A perfectly acceptable relationship.

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What's the difference between your garage and mine? A pile of dead babies.

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What do you call a mexican man working at a Taco Bell? A young man freshly out of high-school, who could not get into college because his family is sadly struck with poverty. He also has a baby on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection when having relations with his girlfriend while he was intoxicated. I wish him the best of luck!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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