What follows 2 days of rain? Statistically more rain, but you'll have to check the weather report to be sure.

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Q. What is worse than being raped A. Being raped twice

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you were so loud you woke helen keller up!!!!!!!

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three black teenagers went to the cinema to watch twilight

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What's worse than finding a worm in your pork? Finding half of a worm, because the worm you just ate is going to live in your stomach, breed, then come out your butt. Or the Apocalypse.

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What's big, grey, and can't climb a tree? A car park.

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If you're paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes fit in a doghouse? None! Ice cream doesn't have bones!

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The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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What's the best anti-pest control of all time???? The Holocaust.

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A man is taking a shower in jail where he drops the soap. He proceeds to pick the soap up and cleans the rest of his body, puts his orange jumpsuit on and returns to his cell.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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Q: whats good about having sex with 18 year olds? A: there's 18 of them.

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We are as to jokes as atheists are to religion.

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emma: mat has a quick reaction time

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i man walks into a bar, he is found dead two days later with severe head trauma.

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why did the duck swim upside-down -he was on quack

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What did Washington say to California? WC

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What Sound does a baby make in a blender? I don't know I'm to busy masturbating to it

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Whats 89 x 67? Sponge. Whats 10 + 9? 19 Whats 9 + 10? 21!

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Why didn't the vampire go to the Garlic festival? Because it sucks.

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why did mad is on home s walk becuaes a isnt a number

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roses are red violets are blue no seriously they are

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 6's boss, has been sexually assaulting 6 for years at work, but 6 needs the money too bad to say anything or quit his job.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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