What do you call a woman outside of the kitchen? Out of place.

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What did the goat say to the zebra? Nothing. Goats can't speak

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What do you call a black man running faster than a white man? Usain Bolt

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What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Cancer. What did he get for his birthday? He didn't make it that far...

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What do you get when you combine a potato and an apple? A nice Apple Potato Souffle...

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Why did little jimmy fall off the building? 9/11

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HEYEEYAHEYAYYAEEAHHAAA

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Roses are red Violets are silly Grease up your flaps Cause here comes my willy!

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What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

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What did John's girlfriend get him for their 5 year anniversary? Proactive because his acne bothers her.

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Your mum is so fat, she is likely to do die before my mum.

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How do you get Helen Keller to keep a secret? You politely ask her not to tell anyone.

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Why does Michael J. Fox have a good handshake? He has a firm grip

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What did the little kid say to the stranger? Nothing. He was taught not to talk to strangers.

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My uncle Magnus and my Aunty Agnus had a baby and named it.............Death.

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Neil Lewis

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Once Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a guy so hard that he got a large bruise.

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2 + 2 = fish

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knock, knock who's their? police get down on the ground!

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What do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's pussy.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the Mortgage company. You haven't payed your loans. The man loses his house and becomes homeless.

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What do you call your mom after she brings a guy home from a bar? A very caring woman because she doesn't want him driving drunk.

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What is the last bit of snow to fall from the sky called? Nothing. Meteorologists have not come up with a scientific term for this phenomenon.

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A man is playing pacman, on his last life, and is cornered. He inserts another coin in the slot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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