Why did the stranger sexually assault the woman? --Because he was a sexual predator..

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An insane individual walks into a bank and asks for $500. The teller refuses since he doesn't have an account, so the individual pulls out a gun and asks the teller again. The teller presses the silent panic button, causing the cops to show up and arrest the gunman, but not before he manages to shoot the teller and the small child standing next two counters over.

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Say you are caught in a net with 10 other people in said net at a construction site. A pair of scissors are right next to you and everyone said to use the scissors. But instead of using the scissors, you use your teeth in risk of a broken tooth.

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A black man, a white man, and a group of Jews were all walking down the street. They got hit by a bus.

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What do you call a purple chicken eating a bicycle? A purple chicken eating a bicycle

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so an apple walks into a bar... I'm terrible at making jokes...

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Q: Why is Santa's sack so big? A: Because he only cums once a year

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Where would Tupac be if he was white? Not the morgue

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Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

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How do you make a person laugh? Tell a good joke How do you make them cry? Tell a sad story How do you make them cry and laugh at the same time? Tell a bad joke

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Lisa: Omg Karen, just had sex with Ben, his weiner was sooo tiny lol. Ben: I think you sent me the wrong text.

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There's 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving. Probably one of the 2 men.

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What did you get for your birthday? I got older

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Im Harold Camping.... and i enjoy scaring the shit out of you

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a horse walks into the bar. the bartender asks why the long face.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

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What happens when three drunk men are driving 80 miles off of a cliff. They all die on impact from the great fall and their family's mourn over their deaths for years to come.

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how many niggaz dose it take to fit in al lightbolb?? 36 ahahahh yall deez nutz

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An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A painting with black, white and red paint.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Poems don't have to rhyme... Refrigerator

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A bear just broke into my house and im scared…...... Oh wait thats just my 350 pound teacher… now i'm even scareder

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Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass is half empty. Realist: Find something better to do than talk about a glass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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