How to apply total justice 1: Kill all humans! Moral: "Why do I have to die while he gets to live? Nobody gets to live? Sounds fair and just to me!"

What is 1 + 1 equal to? 2, because if you have one orange and if you add another orange, you will have 2 oranges, therefore 1 plus 1 is 2.

Why did the girl fall off the swingset? Because she got hit by a refridgerator.

jingle bells jingle bells,, bells were jingled!

What did the southern uncle say to his nephew when he woke up? Good morning, son.

How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? None, for the task at hand is so simple, you should do it.

What is worse than being lost in the supermarket? Being lost in space.

A man walks into a bar, politely orders one drink, sips it while having social conversations with his peers, pays his tab, and goes to take the bus home. I can respect that.

i read the terms of service when i posted this

What'd the black woman say when she met her husband's white mistress? Hello, nice to meet you.

a boy scout wipes his butt with a dollar cause he had no toilet paper then the other boy scout hears him screaming they meet up later and the other boy scout askes why he was scream and the first boy scout says that is hard to wip your butt with 4 quarters.

So God answered a paralyzed boy's prayer the other day...He said 'No'

A man walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

What do you call an Asian man in a car? A motorist.

Yo mamma is so old that she lives in a retirement home for the aged, and will most likely die there in several years.

how do you get a blonde to stop following you? file a restraining order.

Does an Anti-Joke need to have an ironic punch line? ...

Where do 5 gay guys go????? One Direction.

What did the old man say to kid who was begging to his mommy? Shut up.

Knock knock Who's there Ted Bundy

Roses are red Violets are red Bushes are red Why's my garden on fire?

You know whats worse than finding 3 dead children in your house? Finding 2 dead children in your house.

Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it is an animal without a high enough level of intelligence to see the dangers in doing so.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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