Whats brown and sticky? Poop on a warm summers night.

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What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari. A Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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what's 6 inches long and women love? my penis

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whats worse than speaking with your mouth full? pooing with your mouth full

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Whats the hardest thing to have sex with? a goldfish.

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A black man has just died on your porch. What do you do? Immediately call for medical assistance and perform CPR.

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A blond, a brunette, and an Asian take a test. They all get exceptional grades and pass college.

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A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

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how many couples does it take to screw in a light bulb. 1 the wife to go buy the light bulb and the husbend to put it in.

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Gordon Brown smiles.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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What did the oncologist say to his patient? You have terminal cancer.

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Why did little Susie fall off the cliff? I pushed her.

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What do you call your female dog? Your bitch

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Some people like melon and others like soup.

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Womens Rights. Excist in nearly every country on Earth today.

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Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

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jibby jobby

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Why did the chicken cross the road!? He was supposed to be dead! You are by far the most incompetent chicken assassin we've ever had. You're fired.

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How do you get 2x1=4? Do the wrong math.

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You want to know how I got these scars? A horrible knife throwing accident.

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An Italian leaves the mofia

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what do you call two indian men lying next to each other? i dont think there is a name for it but im sure you call them by there names.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops