How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? None. Babies shouldn't be changing light bulbs.

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Q: What did the homeless man get on his Birthday? A: Hypothermia.

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What did the wall say to the floor? Nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the buchter.

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What's black and white and eats like horse? A zebra.

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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God made rivers God made lakes God made you We all make misstakes

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Knock Knock. *silence* Knock Knock.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there Hey, it's Dave. Oh well come on in.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because a fridge hit him.

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why did jimmy loose the bike race. because he never entered.

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What's liquid, clear, and tastes like water? H20

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LUKE, I am your father... this is your mother, your parents dont love you so we've adopted you

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You know what makes me sick? Bacteria

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What do you call a person that smells like shite and chases uglier girls than him? .. . . . . . . .. . . . . . Smelly McD the smelly cunt

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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Why did the poorly educated man get fired from the M&M factory? He changed the M's to W's!

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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Dad always said that laughter was the best medicine. Maybe that's why he died of tuberculosis.

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Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

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why did the girl chug her tub of frosting? she had no spoon

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A: What did the Orange say to the Mango? B: Sup Hommie?! A: Wtf.... (awkwardly walks away)

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a blond readhead and a brunnett were driving to Miami, they saw a sign for next exit Miami, turned off the exit went to the beach did some shopping and all had a great time together.

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how did the asian man get on the internet? by opening his internet browser just like everyone else

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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