Roses are red Violets are blue Carnations are cheap and they will not get you a blow job.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs water skiing? An anchor

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why did the panda and puppy get into a fight? how should i know, you tell me.

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What's worse than anti-jokes? The holocaust.

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What did one jew say to the other? Hello.

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Knock knock" my mom says not to talk to strangers!"

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The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

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derp

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What is worse than you commiting suicide? the many years of mourning and threapy your loved ones may have to go though

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What do fat kids and whales have in common? Ruth burden

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What happens when 2 gay men rub their penises together Jello

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? A victim of animal cruelty.

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Women's Rights

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen Property.

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There are two bears in a shower. One bear says "pass the soap." the other bear says "no soap. Radio."

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What ticks and makes a very loud noise? the bed

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Knock knock who's there? Boo. Boo who? Uh, Boo Johnson, your next door neighbor. Forget it I'll come another day.

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Why can't the toucann fly anymore? Because they're extinct

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Q:what does jgjdhter hjldhgukrh mean A: it means something it is a real word

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-knock knock -i'm not at home, go away!

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What do you get when do you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence.

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Several ways to annoy people: Grab the end of their shirt to blow your nose Try to shove a bowling ball down there throat Try to sell them a broom and vacuum Try to eat their babies paint their toe Nibble their ankles Ask if you can babysit their crystal and if they say no start whining Carry around your chicken and ask if they want a nugget

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, Who gives a shit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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