- Anti Joke

How do u get high, meet a leprachaun, and touch a rainbow? U find a leprechaun shoot him, steal his pot, and run up the rainbow silly!

Three politicians walk into a sports bar. Suddenly, everyone is watching the Stanley Cup playoffs.

What do you call a kite that doesn't fly. A broken kite.

How do you fit an elephant inside your car? I don't understand why this task would even need to be performed. I have never arrived anywhere in my car and thought "Sure could use an elephant right about now..."

Why couldn't Billy the bird fly? He was an ostrich, ostriches can't fly.

How do you make people run? When someone is behind you, hold the door open and wait.

OMG THIS ACTUALLY WORKS! 1. Hold your breath for 2 mins 2. Die

How do you kill a jew? Same way you would anyone

Did you hear about the comedian cereal killer?...He raped his victims before strangling them to death.

What's the difference between a prostitute and your mom? Your mom is a well educated lawyer who earns half a million dollar a year while the prostitute sells her own body for an extremely small amount of money.

Did you hear the one about the chicken crossing the road? It wanted to go to the other side.

why didn't love legs cross the road because he had no balls

Whats the similairity between a dog and a cat? They're both cats, except for the dog.

What's worse than walking into a door by accident? Finding out that your mother molestors children.

Knock knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But his one doesn't.

how do you get a mexican to fall off of a cliff? you push them off

What did the devout Catholic man say to his gay neighbours who just got married? "Congratulations!"

What do tomatoes, apples, oranges, lemons, and peaches have in common? They are all fruits.

Q: Where do zombies shop? A: Zombercrombie.

Why do pokemon have hair? because they have no balls

Whats the difference........ Between a duck?

Q: What is the answer to 255 x 23? A: A number!