Why did the priest blow a kiss and waved to the little girl? She was his daughter. Why did the daughter's mother call the cops on the priest? Child support

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He is seriously pissed off about being repeatedly subjected to this level of intense interrogation. Do you ask other animals why they chase their tails or claw at dirt? Do people ask you why you run when you're late? How would you like to have every move you made transformed into some cliche, old farce? There's a road, he's a chicken, there are only so many possible outcomes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a chicken and was probably not aware that it was walking across a road at all, especially considering that it was likely in a low-traffic rural area.

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Why does the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have legs to walk and they are not able to fly across the road, like the rest of their bird friends.

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Why didn't the woman cross the road? She died from breast cancer.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Tim and Jim are Telling Jokes Tim: Knock Knock ... Jim does not respond because Tim has a mental disorder causing him to believe in hypothetical doors and thus ignores him so that he does not upset his friend

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Hey dude. who died.... crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets YO MAMA

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Why are butt pirates butt pirates? Because they just ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR FRUITS

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Why did the blonde leave the lamp on while sleeping? Because it helps to see in case you need to get up in the middle of the night. YOU THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO SAY "BECAUSE THEY'RE A LIGHT SLEEPER!" MUAHAHAHAHAHA

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Q: Why are Dino-Nuggets so good? A: Because they are nuggets in the shape of dinosaurs.

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A man said to another man," you are so stupid you climbed a glass wall to see what was on the other side." The second man said," well you were on this side of the wall and I'm going to kick your ass." The second man had been drinking that night.

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When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

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A vegetarian walked into a butcher Luckily he realized where he was and walked out!

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i know leaves are green because of chlorophyll but i don't know how to get a mortgage this is the kind if shit your parents pay for

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What did the man's ex-wife told him after their divorce? "Build a bridge and get over did" And so he did because hes a contractor that specialized in structures spanning and providing passage over a gap or barrier, such as a river or roadway

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What did little Susie give to young Billy on Christmas? Genital Herpes.

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Why did the man go bra shopping? Cause he is a single father and his teenage daughter needs a new one.

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cats are pussies

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Why did the man fall off his bike? He ran into a pile of dead babies.

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Whats worse then getting caught watching porn? 9/11

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I scream, you scream, we all scream for shit

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Whats red and tastes like parsley? Not Red Parsley

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what did the blond do when her house was on fire? she called the fire department, because that would be the correct thing to do in such a situation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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