Covert trance, black Ops, and something I kinda made up myself. The first two are basically using suggestions without the victim being aware of it, that is how that famous bank robber that just asks nicely for all the cash and gets it succeeds. The other is tricking the "allmighty" subconcious and again, my own invention people claim its called "this and that", I know, because I coined most of the terms. Anyway, you put people into a deep state of trance, you tell them to take a step forward into the sea, and well, you actually led them down the top of a skyscraper or something fun... "Now... Suck on the lollipop I have between my, okay ill stop"

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A cat ran into the road...I hit it

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there Not Sarah

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You are so ugly that when u were born, your mom was unable to breast-feed you because she would have to look at your face to do so.

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What did the farmer that lost his tractor say? Wheres my tractor?

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whats wosre than stubbing your toe? being lost on a desert island being raped

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What's the difference between Hurricane Sandy and Barrack Obama? One is a catastrophic event that resulted in thousands of deaths, countless power outages and homes destroyed, and millions of dollars in damages, and is said to be one of the worst tropical storms to ever hit the nation. The other is the President of the United States, who has put in an unbelievable amount of effort to fix our economy, create jobs, and make America a better place to live. So as you can see, the two things are extremely different. One must wonder why this question was even asked in the first place, as one is a human being and the other is a storm, making any common traits between them almost non-existent.

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch!"

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Why did Greg move to the Lake District? Because his dog died and the family is in mourning.

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Roses are Dead, Voilets are, too Now shut up and say nothing Because we're watching you

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Why did the little girl fall off her bike? Because she had leprosy and had to have her legs and arms amputated

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a cop wrote most of these anti-jokes O.o

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what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

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wHY DIDN'T THE HORSE FINISH COLLEGE? HIS GRANT RAN OUT AN HE COULDN'T GET ANOTHER STUDENT LOAN.

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic and his problem is destroying his family.

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What was the last thing to go through Kurt Cobain's mind? His teeth.

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What's the difference between Futurama and One Direction? Futurama only has one bender.

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What do you call four black people in a car? A family road trip.

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Why did the weiner dog puncture Doris's bladder? It got carried away during an oral sex session.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not yours.

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Why did the man drive into the river? He was sleep deprived from working overtime.

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What did the black guy get on the SATs? Who knows, that isn't a specific person

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It's not illegal, it's just frowned upon... like... masterbating on an airplane.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have a gassing chamber and you are a jew

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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