A priest a rabbi and a minister are all standing at the gates of heaven. Us mortal beings can only conjecture what might've have taken place.

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Mind magic for fuck ups: Did you know you can train your dog to magically arrive by saying YOUR name! Just tell it what your name is a lot and voila! Moral: made me laugh, fuck the rest of you XD

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What do you call a police woman who shaves her pubes? PC Marion Jones

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What do you call someone who's father is black (born in Kenya), mother is white (born in Canada), and was himself born in Australia? Someone with tri-citizenship

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure

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Why was the little boy cold? Cause he was traped In a fridge

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If an old person falls in the middle of the woods do they make a sound? No their died.

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A flight attendant walks up to a black man on a plane. She then asks if he would like anything to drink.

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this is not a drill.

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What's more traumatising than watching your dad raping a man? Watching a man raping your dad.

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Q: What do the Gynecologist and the pizza delivery man have in common? A: They both get to smell the goods but neither one of them can eat it

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Why did humpty dumpty have a great fall? He was committing suicide.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

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Roses are Gray. Violets are Gray. I am a Dog.

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What's the worst part about eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheel chair.

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Me Chinese Me no joke Me die of cancer.

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Women's Rights.

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? With little Nazis.

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Q: What's white, is Mel Gibson, and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree? A: Mel Gibson.

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I'd like to make this joke funnier but I can't. It's stupid. I don't even like it.

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1 out of every 3 relationships someone is cheating, I wonder if it was my wife or my girlfriend

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Did you know that in the country of Nigeria, every minute, 60 second passes?

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How do you tell if an alien had been in your house? All your lightbulbs are gone and your fridge is pregnant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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