Greg and Michal once had a fight I lost.

What do you get when you hit a kid with a hockeystick? arrested.

A white guy, a mexican, and a black guy are in a race. Who always wins? Whichever one crosses the finish line first

Why didn't the woman need a watch? Because she had both her hands amputated after battling diabetes.

What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?" Oh ya he had alzheimers.

Why was the iPhone screen cracked? Because it was dropped on a rock.

How did the man die? A gorilla raped him

So I'm at the office and I tell this guy, "Hey can you pass me the stapler. But when you pass it over, make sure there are staples in it 'cause if not, I can't staple anything."

What do you get if you cross a man and a horse? Severe internal bleeding.

What did the African say to the Mexican? "Hola, Como estas?" and the Mexican did not respond because he didn't speak Spanish.

What did Little Jimmie say to his mom when he got home frome school? Nothing his moms dead.

A black person went into a store and paid full price for his tv

A man asks his wife to make him a sandwich, she proceeds to make a sandwich using rye bread, lettuce, two slices of tomatoes, a variety condiments, mustard and several slices of American cheese. The man eats the sandwich at a parade with his wife celebrating Woman's Rights.

Why did the Grandad teabag his Grandson? Because he likes dipping his balls into the mouths of his Grandchildren; as if they were a teabag and his mouth was a mug.

Roses are red, vilotes are blue Erics a dick and Chase is too.

Q: why are you gay A: because your physically attracted to the same sex

What do chicken and babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

Bible Fact0idz: "Something Drink my blood and consume my flesh and live forever something" Jesus- dead age 30something alcoholism liver problems and diabeetus at time of death, crucified and not been seen since, return pending? Classified Alcoholic. Moral: "YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!"

What's red and green and goes 100mph? A frog in a vehicle on the Autobahn.

Did I invite you to my birthday party? No. Then why are you at my birthday party?

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

Mr. Wonder, optimism is seeing the glass as half full, pessimism as seeing the glass half empty, and realism as not seeing the glass at all.

where did suzie go when the bomb hit her?? Everywhere

What happens when a black guy roles over a speed-bump? I don't know. I have never tried it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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