Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the moon. It burnt up on re-entry

thumb_up thumb_down +2

ask me if im a boy are you a boy? none of your buisness.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

True or False : it would not cause a public disturbence to express your P0rnagraphy to the public??? true. P0rnagraphy is the freedom of speech and ability to express oneself

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what happened to the guy that got shot in the head? Nothing, it was a water gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a black man that cuts people up and takes their money? A surgeon.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what do you call a mexican baptism? a bean dip

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why did the mexican beat your ass larry clark III because you live in a apartment with your mom and dad who are black your dad has a truck your mom recked her car

thumb_up thumb_down +2

lets go to the beach beach lets go get away story of josh browns life

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's grey and can't swim? A Castle

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the boy fall of of his bicycle? He was hit by an asteroid.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's the difference between Rob Schnieder and Jelly Beans? Someone besides Adam Sandler likes Jelly Beans.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the munchy alzhemiers farmer say about his missing tractor? Where's my tators?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no sense Microwave

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the Koala Bear fall out of the tree? Because shortly before, it's life had ended due to lethal chlamydia, which is not uncommon for a Koala Bear these days. Due to it's loss of thought and therefore muscle control, it lost it's grip on the branch it was holding and naturally gravity took over.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Four surgeons are taking a coffee break: 1st surgeon says "Accountants are the best to operate on because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered." 2nd surgeon says "Nah, librarians are the best. Everything inside them is in alphabetical order." 3rd surgeon says "Try electricians, man! Everything inside them is color coded." 4th surgeon says "I prefer Chelsea fans. They're heartless, spineless, gutless and their heads and asses are interchangeable."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How did the Black man die at the KFC? Someone killed him.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your dick is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Make it? Sodium levels? Means he is eating right? Its not ADHD, the chatter is his way of coping with pain and what I believe is PTSD (dont tell him, he would get mad, if he gets that blank stare while chatting a lot its like he is back in the past for a while, please distract him out of it, but dont tell him anything about that. Give him what he wants, its a secret but Nero masters hypnosis, and he pretty much knows himself to a point far beyond others know themselves, he can sense lies and knows how others are feeling just by the movement of their pupils, their eyes, their breath, the tonality of their voice and lots of things like that, I think thats some sort of hypnosis as well, he uses ritalin in order to focus and shut off pain receptors mentally and stuff I don't understand, I am sure he would not ask for it unless he knew he could take it, he has literally performed surgery on himself before, the kind that would kill anyone unless under strong anesthetics. (removed bullets from the back of his skull, people say its just a myth, but I was there so I know its true) Please trust me on this as weird as it might sound.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A kid walked into a bar and ordered a drink and then was arrested for drinking under the age of 18

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you get when you cross a man with a horse? The Nobel Prize for your advancement of genetic sciences; centaurs aren’t real.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did George Bush blow up the Twin Towers on 9/11? 9/12 was his girlfriends birthday.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why do black guys have white palms? Because that area of the human hand contains no melanocytes, the cells that allow pigment to form.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

hey i just met you and this is c r a z y , but im a pirate so call me matey ;)

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What happened when the high school student had intercourse with his history teacher? orgasmic noises.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops