why did joe drop his clock? billy ran into him, therfore making the clock wobble in his hand until it fell at 34 mph.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What is fat and white? A polar bear with a glandular problem.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock Knock! Who's there? No one. No one who? Cares.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what did the boy with dyslexia get for his birthday? bad grades

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what gets louder as it gets smaller? a baby in a trash compacter.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock Knock Who's there? Just open the damn door.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A man walks into a bar,gets a drink, and then leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Women

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A man in a wheelchair walks into a bar... ...wait a second.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

why did the man fart? because he felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock knock Who's there? The bank. We've come to evict you from your house.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and smashed his head on a jagged rock and screamed in anguish. Jill watched in horror as her brother suffered through the agonizing pain. Jack was rushed to the hospital immediately, but despite the doctors' efforts, he died. Jill mourned the loss of her brother for many years after the incident.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

obama

thumb_up thumb_down +16

MAKE TEA NOT WAR!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

knoc knock! who's there? poo on! poo on who? you!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC for his job interview

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Starting a Genocide #YOLO

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what do you find at the top of mountains? things

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Your mom is so fat when she sat on wallmart she lowered the prices

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's the difference between a melon and a baby? You have to cut open the melon before you can eat it

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops