What is worse than failing a class? Dress up for grown-ups.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Knock knock. Who's there? Frank. Frank who? Cut the shit, I'm being chased by a tiger!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the three blind mice say to the priest? I'm blind :(

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the Mexican cross the road? The light was green.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why is motorboating so much fun? Because they are unmatched for their speed and agility in the water.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's black and white and red all over? A piece of discarded newspaper previously covering the half dismembered torso of a dead prostitute.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Seargent: Quick seal off all the exits so he cant get away. Private: OK 2 minutes later Private: He escaped sir Seargent: What, how Private: through one of the entrances

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did Jesus say as he walked on water and people went like WOHOO! OMG WE ARE TOTALLY GOING TO CHISEL THIS INTO JEWTUBE SO EVERYONE CAN SEE! "BEHOLD AS I WALK UPON THIS WATER WHILE ALL OF YOU HAVE FAILED BEFORE ME! ONLY I CAN WALK OF THIS WATER OF FROZEN WITHOUT SLIPPING! Nero: Because go fuck yourself asshole. Lol... Jewtube was not as widely available as youtube so yeah... Walking on ice without falling over was a big thing back then... You know such as OMG! EATING BREAD AND DRINKING WINE! WOOOOOOAAAAH SCIENCE! AND BURNING BUSHES SPOKE AND... Moral: "Ill be back, you know, just to annoy you, and because I want to, a real man needs no other reason, and that is why you fuckers need so many of them"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's woman spelled backwards? Sandwich-maker.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the policeman say to the black thief? You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do may be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to consult an attorney before speaking to the police and to have an attorney present during questioning now or in the future. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed for you before any questioning, if you wish. If you decide to answer any questions now, without an attorney present, you will still have the right to stop answering at any time until you talk to an attorney. Knowing and understanding your rights as I have explained them to you, are you willing to answer my questions without an attorney present.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the black man smell really bad? A: becuase he ran out of paper

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A black guy walks into a bar orders his drink and could not do it in a more civilized way

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you haven't already said twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a giraffe? A really f*cked up hybrid.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the guy lie down? He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

how does stephen hawking get an erection? he turns off his pop-up blocker

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: Why did James cry? A: Because he's an infant and still quite afraid of his surroundings

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why don't you see elephants find in trees? Because most trees can't hold an elephants weight.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

New Name for Jersey Shore: American Whorer Story

thumb_up thumb_down +12

XD I literally cant stop laughing XD, thats like a manly tussle would go down huh? XDXDXD Cartoon Network? Is that thing still on anywhere? You like watching cartoons? I don't mind if you do.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the chicken taunt the opposing team? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's drivers license had been revoked for all of it's DWI's.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops