Why did the priest blow a kiss and waved to the little girl? She was his daughter. Why did the daughter's mother call the cops on the priest? Child support

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's black and white and red all over? An interracial couple that has just been brutally murdered. If you see this, you should probably notify the local police so that they may investigate the situiation.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

a man walks into a bar the bar tender says why the long face? i just walked into a bar

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A black man walks into a bar. He sits down and has a couple drinks. When he is finished, he generously tips the bartender and walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was the white girl crying? Because she was sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in an apple within a worm inside your apple...

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Knock Knock! whos there? Me! I kill you!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

There was a brunette, a blonde and a red head, They were all great friends!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

a dyslexic made a dessert. it was a bit dry.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Diarrhea

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Wanna hear a joke......... your moms face !!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I thoroughly dislike arabs, I lost both my parents in the events of 9/11.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I would, but I see an older version of the kid, that suffered so much pain and agony.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Knock Knock! EXPLOSION!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

just in time?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A black man walks into a store and buys a gun based upon the increasing crime rate in his area.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Who's lower than Iran? United Arab Emirates.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

knock knock. who's there? Alticka Alticka who? Alticka pudding cup.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? monkey see monkey do why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? it lost its footing why did the girl fall down? she was hit by four monkeys and a refridgerator

thumb_up thumb_down +3

CAUSE IT'S ONE, TWO, THREE STRIKES YOU'RE OUT

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. Are you a grapefruit? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops