You're so fat. Well maybe to kids born in Africa.

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Why was there an awkward silence? Because numerous people gathered in a room were not talking.

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What's black and white and red all over? A car in which some young hoodlum appears to have splashed a fair amount of red paint over the owner's otherwise charming checker pattern.

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Q. What is the fastest animal in the world? A. An Ethiopian chicken.

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What does an elephant and a plum have in common? They are both purple... except for the elephant

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Well, there's one way...

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Not lying Red, I have my contacts, I am a "facilitator", I pull strings for my employers, and sure the FBI has me on their files, after all we have cooperated with them. Not because I wanted to, but because its my job, and it helps me use the best of my abilities and limited education (I am technically an educated lawyer, and not an agent).

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monster under your bed? thank god im in your closet...........

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Two Jews, three Nazis, and a black guy go into a bar. Where they have a spirited debate about Canadian football. And leave without coming to any conclusions.

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What the the newly born male dog get for his first birthday? A loss of two testicles.

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What's that on my back? Tell me it's your phone ! Its my phone.

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What's liquid, clear, and tastes like water? H20

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How do you make a puppy stop barking? Throw a brick at it.

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Why was the gay guy sad?

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Chrismas? A: Cancer

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Why did the Arab bomb the US? Because it was his job.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 took sexual advantage of 9.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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What's yellow and goes up and down? A banana in an elevator.

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So three philosophers walk into a bar. Is it necessarily the case that they walk into a bar?

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What is brown and sounds like a pickle? Poop

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dude ur such a bon of a sitch

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What do you call a fly without wings? A walk

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How many fairies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, but I don't know how they got in there.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops