why did the irishman, the englishman and the african man die? because i went on a violent killing spree, murdering everyone i saw

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she was clumsy. Nevertheless the accident was minor and she did not injure the arms that she had.

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How do you kill a dwarf? You put rope around his neck and attach the other end to a concrete slab. Proceed to then through him in the ocean.

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Why doesn't anybody like the octopus? There anti-social creatures by nature

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A jew is a person of the jewish faith and a pizza is delicious food.

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Whats black and can multitask? My IPod you racist!

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What do you call cheese that doesn't belong to you? Someone else's cheese.

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What do you get when you cross Winter Squash, Beets, Ham, Coffee, Spinach, Hexamine, Cadmium, Detergent, and some love? A bowl full of crap.

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DING DONG! Did you have to ring the doorbell? You just ruined a good knock knock joke!

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Roeses are purple violets are green WTF u just stabbed me.

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What did the piece of macaroni say as they boy was about to eat him? Nothing. Foods are uneducated and illiterate therefore unable to speak, and went into the boy's mouth without a trouble.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Dracula." "Dracula who?" He pulls his cape up to his face and says, "May the force be with you,"

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Your grandma and your mom drove of a cliff, who survived? Both of them they didn't drive off a cliff

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Hey, look over there! It's ur mom!

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Whats cooler than being cool in High School? Nothing, now take a hit...everyone's looking

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Cars were invented after her death, so she never had the opportunity to learn.

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field day?

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Dad always said that laughter was the best medicine. Maybe that's why he died of tuberculosis.

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What did Jesus say to the giraffe? Good day to you sir.

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Knock Knock whose there YOUR MOM

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Several ways to annoy people: Grab the end of their shirt to blow your nose Try to shove a bowling ball down there throat Try to sell them a broom and vacuum Try to eat their babies paint their toe Nibble their ankles Ask if you can babysit their crystal and if they say no start whining Carry around your chicken and ask if they want a nugget

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how did the family die? They were shot in the head.

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Q: How did the blonde girl get into Harvard? A: hard work, dedication, and a perfect SAT score.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops