did you hear about the platypus that was found dead in the middle of death valley?

Why was the little kid sad at a funeral. He was actually happy and he was at six flags

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Sometimes I stare at a Frisbee and wonder why it is getting bigger. Then, it hits me.

What's red, hairy, and squishy? Helen Keller in a blender.

When is a door not a door? Never, a door is an inanimate object and is thus incapable of transforming.

what did the homeless man get for christmas.......................nothing

Hey I just met you. And this is crazy. So get in my van. Cause I have candy.

What does a horse and a donkey have in common? They are both very different from trees

What worse that punching a baby? Stabing one.

Why couldn't little Sally fall asleep? She was on fire.

What has two wheels and a handle bar? A bike.

A black guy and a white guy both get pulled over by a cop for speeding. The white guy is promptly released with a stern warning, whle the black guy is thouroughly questioned and has his car searched for drugs, with the probable cause being that the black guy has bloodshot eyes, reeks of weed and has a bong in his frontseat.

A Jehovah's Witness knocks on my door. I didn't answer the door.

What did Kim Kardashian say when she got a breast implant? DERP!

Do you like fishsticks No

Where is one place everyone eventually goes to rest? A cemetery.

How many fat Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Fish don't run.

Scientific fact: If you took all the veins from your body and laid them end to end, you would die.

A man walks into a bar... The steal bar hurt his face and had to get stitches.

Q: How do you make scrach paper? A: Take a paper and scrach it.

What is worse than eating shoxy poulet.? Nothing

what worse the 2 dead kids in a van 3 dead kids in a van

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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