What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk, idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why is Easter better than christmas? Theres a significantly less chance of getting raped by a man in a Santa Claus costume.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's the difference between a chair and an identical chair? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q. Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A. Because he got shot. Q. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A. Because he was stapled to the first monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What is worse then finding repeated jokes on anti jokes? finding a womr in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Cornelius went to the dcotor and got a sticker and a lollipop for being a good patient. He later went home and shoved the lollipop stick up his dick hole and started wildly masturbating. I forgot to mention Cornelius was 42 years old.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Your mom is so ugly, that her job prospects are affected negatively, and your family suffers as a consequence.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man walks into a bar. He has suffered from a concussion and is now in the emergency room.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

An Admiral walks into Ackbar...

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Peg leg Pete, yay, I know stuff too, I watched that one all the time when I was a girl.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man buys a kitten from the store. He gets home, takes it out of its cage, and realizes that it wasn't the kitten he wanted. He then returns to the store and exchanges for the kitten he originally wanted, but then decides to keep both because he is feeling particularly hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's black and has the texture of tar? Molasses

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why was 9 afraid of 10 because 10 was a registered sex offender

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a bag of dead babies. I don't have a Ferrari in garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

In Soviet Russia, Stalin kills you

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How much does the Holo cost? Six million.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why are AntiJokes so funny? Because your brain analyses them and makes you laugh.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

homosexuals are gay

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a guy eating a sandwich? Whatever his name is.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the cat say to the dog? Meow

thumb_up thumb_down +20

800 people died last year. end of story

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What happened to the man who lost his job? He couldn't support his family so they all became homeless and eventually died of starvation.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops