Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? I don't have a last name.

Wha did the fireman say when he burnt his finger? Shit.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I can't really remember the reason, it was about 5 years ago and a lot of things have happened since.

'Dyslexic man walks into a bar... and orders a pint

George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

What do you call a gay Chinese math teacher? A gay Chinese math teacher.

Why didn't the blind girl go to the party? She wasn't invited!

A dyslexic man walks into a bra!

how do people without arms and legs have sex? no one has sex with people without arms and legs.

A man walks into a bar... The steal bar hurt his face and had to get stitches.

have you seen ray charles' house? neither has he.

What did the man say when he put his penis in the blender? Arghhhhhhh!

Why was 9 afraid of 10 because 10 was a registered sex offender

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a car

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? a fridge was thrown at her

Of course, first door on your left

I'm a white rapper I do it all the time Folks don't like me cuz my words don't match

A blind man walks in a bar I mean like a metal bar But it didn't hurt He only laught

Why did the chicken cross the road? I have no idea but I don't see why it would want to cross a road in the first place. It is a chicken.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have AIDS we're dying together

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Turns out a man suffering from schizophrenia believes he is a bartender for animals as his health slowly declines as his family comes to visit him every day.

What did the brown guy say to the black person when he got fired? Nothing, did you think this was going to be racist or something?!

what do you call a kid with no arms and legs under a bus an ambulance, he's obviously in pain

What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...