Q: Why do all Asians have small penises? A: They don't.

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An Asian Man Has His Eyes Wide Open

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left the gate open, letting all his livestock escape, and crushing his prospects of trying to keep his family fed.

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What happens if you go one louder? Nothing because you can't

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A man walks in to a bar and orders a drink. He has been drinking alone every day since his wife an unborn child died in an horrific car accident.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car. -Tag

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Why did the boy go to the hospital? He didn't. Unfortunately the gunshot wound severely injured the boy and he was unable to be revived in time to survive.

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2 men were friends 1 went to hell The other went to heaven

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When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Human: Are you a frayed knot? Frayed knot: I'm afraid so.

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? She said she can do 3

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why was it sad that 3 men were crossing rail road tracks in a toyota and got hit by a train? they ruined the Toyota

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Q: What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? A: His name.

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting black lady. wha....... ehmmm hmmmm!

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What's red and weighs a metric ton? An apple, my scale wasn't calibrated

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A knock knock B who's there A nobody

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I don't find blind jokes funny. Honestly, I just can't see the humor in them.

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A rooster lays an egg on top of a henhouse. Which way does the egg fall? Roosters don't lay eggs.

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Your Momma is so fat that she will most like lose a leg to diabetes which is totally preventable if she eats a well balanced diet. I hope she loses weight. Say hi to her from me please.

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? "Robin, please, get in the Batmobile

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Q: what is the most confusing day in the ghetto? A: fathers Day

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My mother-in-law fell down a stairway. I turned to my wife and said “Call an ambulance!!”

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'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops