TRENT EGENLAUF IS a LITTLE BOY

Why couldn't the woman drive the car? Because she was a woman.

Doctor Doctor! I think i'm epileptic! I'm not the Doctor, I'm the receptionist. You're a hypochondriac, now wait in the Que, like everybody else Mrs. Davis.

This is Heading 1

Why was the boy drinking toilet water? Because he was receiving a violent swirly. He then went home and killed himself.

Where do you find a good lawyer? In the cemetary

A blind man walks into a book store. He asks if they have any books in Braille. The employee says "Yes! Many you haven't even seen before!"

Get the FREE anti jokes app with loads and loads of anti jokes anywhere you go, even offline! All the funniest and most popular, and loads more new ones. Why not? After all, it's free! http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/hilarious-anti-jokes-lite/id438092279?mt=8&ls=1

i feel like i will die some heroic death, but its more likely i will trip over my dog and choke on a spoonful of frosting.

A guy decides to bring his new blonde girlfriend to a football game. After the game is over, he asks her if she liked the game. She replies: "Oh it was great, I loved watching those men in tight clothes, but there is one thing I don't understand." "What did you not understand?" And the blonde says: "Well, at the begginning of the game, both teams flipped a quarter to see who would kick off first. Then the rest of the game everybody was yelling get the quarter back, get the quarter back, get the quarter back. So I thought to myself, gosh it's just a quarter!"

What do u call a banana? A banana......

hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

How many women does it take to change a lightbulb. None, Thomas Edison was a man.

Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

whats the difference between virgin and a porn star?? A virgin hasn't got aids.

Knock knock What?

Have you noticed when you see geese flying and they're in a V pattern, often one side will be longer than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side.

A dog walks into the local newspaper to place an ad. The dog writes; "woof woof, woof woof woof." Receptionist: You know you can ad another two woofs for the same price? Dog: Well that wouldn't make any sense at all?

What do Jim Carrey, Kim Jing-un and Justin Bieber have in common? A penis.

A white man walks down an alley and sees two black men. They say hello and then are on their way.

What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings! What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Adelle....

Knock Knock? Who's there? bob bob who? the builder

What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas, therefore nothing

Why did the Flintstones have Christmas? The Flintstones celebrated Christmas because the creator, William Hanna, celebrated it. As it is a kids TV show, you can't expect it to be factually correct.