A three-legged prostitute, a coal miner, and R. Kelly walk into an all-midget rendition of Stravinsky's Rite of Spring. The miner has a heart attack and dies. The concubine and the vocalist do nothing to help.

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What was the last thing to go through Kurt Cobain's mind? His teeth.

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-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

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I called your friend gay and he hit me with his fist because he was angry at me for using gay in a derogatory way.

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a blond, a brunette, and a redhead are stuck on top of a mountain. they freeze to death and the rescue team discovers their frozen bodies two days later.

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What does a fish say when it swims into a wall? Damn

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There's a black, afghan, and a rhabi. Which one is Obama?

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What do you do when you go downstairs in the middle of the night and see your VCR floating in the middle of the living room? Run and cower in fear in this seemingly impossible situation.

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why did michele jackson rape a kid. because he was horny duhhhh!

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What's big, brown, and full of crap? A septic tank.

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What do you call man who travels on foot? a pedestrian

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sheriff Sheriff who? Sheriff Robinson your husband has died in a local car accident.

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Why did Bob fall off the swim? He had no arms or legs.

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why was the boy sad? his bellybutton hurt

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Knock-Knock Who's there? The UPS guy dumb ass

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a woman goes to an abortion clinic, kills a baby and still leaves pregnant.

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This is my favorite antijoke.

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im typkiking wifrh myv troes. Sorry, i was typing with my toes.

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Why is is afraid of seven? Because seven is a date rapist

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for doing nothing? A black man

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What did a policeman say to his belly? Nothing. Because he knows his belly is incapable of speech.

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Why didn't the man walk up the stairs? He had an acorn stairlift.

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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knock knock, Whos there ? ( runs away ) trololololololololol

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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