Wigan.

What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Give her a time-out. Throwing sharp objects is not okay.

What would Martin Luther King Jr. do if he was alive today? Scream at the top of his lungs as he tried to punch out the top of his coffin.

Knock knock! Who's there? The police your son died in a car crash.

What's brown and sticky? A stick!

Two friends go on a hunting trip together. One friend says to the other "Knock, knock." The other friend doesn't respond because he was mauled by a bear.

2 men walk into a bar. 3 come out

Why did the Mexican jump the fence? He was at his neighbors house and it was shorter to cut through yards than to walk to his house

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? rockband

What did Batman say when he saw Robin? Hey look it's Robin

1 I've been diagnosed with-- 2 I don't give a f*ck, go die in a hole!

Who's a pedophile and not afraid to show it? The clown from McDonald

42

What did the blind, deaf, and dumb child get for Christmas? Cancer.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says why the long face? The horse does not reply because it is a horse. He then is confused of where he is and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a couple stools.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was ran over before it made it to the other side.

Little Stephanie was up all night on Christmas eve excited for her new bike that Santa was going to bring her. After tossing and turning for what seemed like decades, the sunset finally arose and Stephanie ran down the steps to unwrap her new bike with the family. Immediately after she went down the staircase, she found her parents marinated in their own blood, with knife wounds all around their body.

What's brown and sticky? A Stick

What did George Washingtn say to is men before crossing the Delaware? Men, get in the boat.

Why can no one in africa read or write? I would asume the lack of public education combined with the fact that setting up an education system for so many widespread remote comunities would be a logistical nightmare. But then again I have never been to africa and know little about the country and so the premise of this joke is probably a dramatic overstatement in the first place.

What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

If a quiz is also referred to as a quizzicle, then what is a test also referred to as? A test, really. There are no synonyms for 'test' which would result in a humorous punchline; 'exam,' 'essay' and 'evaluation' are the closest possible answers and none of them provide humor at all.

What did the friend say to the other friend? A. Hi friend.

Whats green and smells like bacon................. Green bacon

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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