How many dead babies can you fit in my car? None, I don't allow anyone to put dead babies in my car.

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you wanna hear a good anti joke?, so do i

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What is brown and has three legs? A horse. It lost a leg in a glue factory.

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Jesus can walko water Humans are 70% water I can walk on humans Therefore i am 70% Jesus

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i just got all five seasons of big bang theory in the mail for xmas... i'm divorcing my wife.

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How do you blind fold an asian? Dental floss!

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What do you call a gay man? Homosexual

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have you seen ray charles' house? neither has he.

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an emo kid walks into mcdonalds and orders a happy meal

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his family was raped and stripped of their possessions

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A: Did you know Helen Keller had a treehouse? B: No. A: Neither did she.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? On a fundamental level, it was pursuing evolutionary instincts, perhaps a half-bored interest in food.

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why couldn't sarah ride the bike? She had cerebral Palsy

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Why did the man go to Lourdes Because he has lost all hope

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Knock knock Whos there? Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior jesus christ?

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There was once a man named Larry. Larry was an office worker for a paper company. One day when Larry was counting papers he got a papercut on his left hand. Therefore his finger began to bleed as he sat in agony. What did Larry do next? He got up and got a band-aid. Larry continued his paper work at his desk.

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A British man walks into a bar. He has to get stitches.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? William. William who? You friend...William...you invited me over.. Can I come in?

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Why did Sally cross the road? She didn't, she got hit by my car.

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What's pink and when you press a button it turns red? A baby in a blender. What's pink and when you hit it against the wall sounds metallic? A baby with two forks stuck in its eyes.

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Why won't the carny let the black kid on the carnival ride? He doesn't meet the height requirements

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selena gomez & justin beiber go in space. selena says im hotter than the sun. the way she knows this information is that she is near the sun at this time justin beiber has already drifted off in space.

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Why did the fat guy smell bad? He just farted diarrhea.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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