What did my Grandmother get for Christmas? Alzheimer's.

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Q:what has two legs and bleeds A: a dog cut in half

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How do rocket scientists exchange greetings? They say "hi"

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is black.

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Austin is gay. He goes to River Road. And is a sophomore.

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If she is old enough to bleed, she probably uses tampons.

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baby seal walks into a club

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What did the two doctors say to each other? We are both doctors.

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A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

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Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? He was looking for pooh

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What's funnier than Justin Bieber dying in a car accident? Nicky Minaj being in the same car.

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Why was the boy late for dinner? He got in the van.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Robert. Robert who? Robert Anderson.

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Your Mother

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A priest and a police officer are sitting at a bar. They both have considerable drinking problems because problems unrelated to their respective occupations. The bartender's name is Mike.

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A couple was arguing about how the man was cheating and he was in "The Doghouse". There clever son pointed out that they didn't own a dog.

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A plane is falling out of the sky, and there is a Priest, a little boy, Obama and a rock star. There are 4 parachutes and everyone jumps out safety.

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this is not a drill.

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A duck and a chicken walk into a bar. How improbable.

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Q) What's worse than getting a parking ticket? A) The Black Death

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Q: Whats black, white and red all over? A: not me

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Yes or No? You're wrong because it was both.

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What's white, wet, and salty? Salt that has come in contact with a liquid in the recent past, seeing as the liquid has not evaporated completely from the combination of sodium and chloride yet.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall All the king's horses and all the king's men, went and made an omelette.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops