Yo momma so stupid when I said drinks are on the house she went and got a ladder

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

Why did the black man have to stand in the bus? All of the other seats were taken.

what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

What is Jetlag? When your computer is running too many applications/programs, thus causing the game Jetman on Facebook to lag.

Why did the boy get hit by the ice cream truck? The driver of the ice cream truck was drunk

Roses are red violents are blue I have 5 figures and the middle one is for you

A man is balancing on a bar. But it's a bar where people drink so I don't know how that works.

A man with ADD walks into a bar, what did he say? Look a squirrel!!!

What did the Japanese man do to the pizza? He ate it.

Q: How do you measure a ruler A: You don't.

Roses are red, violets are blue, whoever met you is a BIG fool

What's better than winning $500? Using it to support the Islams to destroy America

A man walks into a bar. -Can I ask where am I? - he sais -Yes, you can. - sais the barman Awkward silence occurs. -Why aren't you asking? I said you can.

Two guys walk into a bat, they have a couple drinks then go home, one crashed and died in a horrible drunk driving accident. The other, who took a cab, went home and viciously beat his wife.

Needless to say,

Why did a man get fired from the M&M store? He was color blind.

How do you make a clown happy then sad? You give him pot then shoot him in the foot

Why does Santa Clause eat cookies? Because cookies not part of a balanced diet.

2 guys walk into a bar the third one ducked

Two fish are in a tank. The first one says, "How the heck do I drive this thing!".

hey i just met you and this is crazy i have alzheimers hey i just met you

what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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