If your waiting in a restaurant for a waiter, doesn't that make you a waiter? O.o

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Q: what do you call a mushy green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

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What does a black guy do to a white girl when the lights go off and there's a bed in the room? They go to sleep so they can have enough energy to work their two jobs and provide for their family after they've been evicted from their home.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, wanna f***.

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What's the difference between a duck? both of it's legs are the same.

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roses are blue, violets are red, im colorblind

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What is a long boring story that no one will ever want to read? the life of Sarah Palin.

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Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Not Michael Jackson!

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theres a black guy and a mexican whos driving the cop

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Why didn't the boy come out of the closet? He had no legs.

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How to make a plummer cry Kill his family

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What do you do if there's a rabid elephant chasing behind you, a vicious jaguar to your right, a rearing horse to your left, and a bloodthirsty lion in front of you? Innoculate yourself with a rabies vaccine, prod the jaguar on the nose with a stick (they hate that and will probably flee as a result), speak softly and calmly to the horse and encourage the lion to go for the elephant instead of you. You will probably still die as a combined result of mauling and trampling, and it's unlikely that you'll have two rabies vaccines to hand by chance for such situations, but your chances of survival will be minimally improved.

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What is the difference between you and a brick? A brick gets laid.

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Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and suffered from a self-inflicted gunshot wound in his head, he is being treated by medical professionals

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Roses are red Viloets are unicorns this? doesn't make sense Refridgeator

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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The anti joke that repeats itself :(

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What's worst than a crying baby? A dead baby What's worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies What's worse than a pile of dead babies? If there's an alive one at the bottom What's worse that an alive baby in a pile of dead babies? If it has to eat its way out.

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What did the blind man say to the deaf man? Can you speak up? I cant hear you!

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A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To look at the most interesting man in the world.

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When life gives you lemons... Be thankful you're not starving, a**hole.

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Why are there no swimming pools in Mexico? The average yearly income is $3,523, and pool chemicals are very expensive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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