Why did the chicken kill himself To get to the other side.

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"Doctor, doctor, I am having a hard time controlling my muscles!" "It's Lesche-Nyhan Syndrome, this is a genetic terminal illness...i'm sorry."

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How does a pirate get to work? His CAAAARRRR! Where does the pirate go after work? The BAAAARRRR! How does the pirate get home from the bar? A taxi. A pirate doesn't drive after consuming alcohol.

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An Asian man is driving a car. He was on the way to the market to buy dinner for his family

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Why was the women's underwear red?... Because she got stabbed.

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THE GAME

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Justin Bieber

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how do you tell the difference between a jew and a muslim? you ask them what their religion is.

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Women's rights

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Why did little timmy cry? He was nailed to a ceiling fan.

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Why did the girl fall off of her swing? Because she had no arms.

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I got pissed off at my little brother... So I threw him out of the window.

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Why didn't the cat eat its supper? It was dead.

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Roses are red the grass is green now open your legs and let me fill you with cream

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child labor

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What's worse than stepping on a Lego? Leukemia

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Did you hear that the actress, Reese what's-her-name, got stabbed to death? Witherspoon? No, with a knife.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a dog, Meow.

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Do you think the death man heard the one about, oh wait I bet he didn't

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The guy above me has a very nice joke

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Why did the gang jump a man for his blue jeep? Answer The gang wanted a blue jeep.

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A 8 year old kid and his dad are having quality time at the park,and relax at a nearby picnic bench after a thrilling game of tag."I love you." says the son. The father about to respond,promptly gets shot by 3 stray military issue assault rifle bullets that came from a heated dispute about a stolen car that got way out of hand. He dies,and the kid ran crying a long distance away. After he gets himself in a dark alley with nobody else around he laughs,and mutters "The plan went perfectly!" He pulls out a detonator and presses it. The White House,Washington Monument,and several nuclear power plants across the continental United States blow up,killing millions of people.The child,also in possession of nuclear bombs, holds the entire world hostage and becomes ruler of the entire planet Earth. Fin.

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A movie trilogy about an alphabet book. A ten minute long movie about a complete lifespan. A 600 pages long book on how to stop procrastination. A two page book about the top 600 award winning pictures. CALL NOW FOR A TELESCOPE INCLUDED! (So you can see the stars and fuck the book altogether) Juggernaut: IM THE JUGGERNAUTBITCH! Me: Hi, mind if I just call you bitch for short? Your life sucks sometimes because Karma is a bitch... ...My bitch ;)

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why did michael jackson write black or white he didnt want black people to copy him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops