Q. why did I get hurt A. My pants fell off

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A man goes to an amusement park. He heads straight for the roller-coaster and gets in line. When he gets to the front, the ride operator informs him that he is too short to ride. "You must be at least 48 inches, sir, you just barely miss the mark, I'm sorry, I can't let you ride." The man is sad, but he doesn't let this little discrepancy ruin his day. He then gets in line for a different ride.

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Moderately entertaining story, friend.

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I was going to post some witty jokes, but then I realized they weren't funny.

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boner

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What's black and white and red all over? A chess board; I lied about the "red all over" part.

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Q: What's that white, sticky stuff on your mom? A: Glue

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why am I writing this...im bored

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? You can't jelly my dick down your throat.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have Alzheimer's Roses are Red

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What's worse than anti-jokes? The holocaust.

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What's blue, and smells like fish? A firetruck, I was kidding about the blue and fish.

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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God

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Knock knock? Who's There? I AMMM!!! (thumb this down please xD)

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Why did the girl lie to the priest? because she didn't want to tell him the truth

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Why do we need to keep answering encryption codes? Because you can't keep a good Jew down (Wyndellberg)

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A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

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Knock Knock! Come in the door is unlocked. I have cookies!

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Q: How did the black man own the Lamborgini? A: He was 2 Chainz.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? It's Jeff. Hi there Jeff, come in, the doors open.

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What do you call a blind person? Mack Despard

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What's sad about an elderly couple who has had a long, fruitful marriage? Nothing.

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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