So a guy walks into a bar. He asks the woman next to him, ''Can I buy you a drink?'' The woman says,''No thank you.''

Q:Why did the boy cry? A: because his mom was hit by a bus Q: why did the boy wipe his face? A:he was covered in his mother blood and threatened all the witness who saw him push his mother into the bus

Yo momma so fat she when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

What hurts worse than a papercut? Divorce.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

Yesterday I was diagnosed with Depression... It made me sad.

have you seen ray charles' house? neither has he.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food?

How many black ppm does it take to screw in a light bulb All of them, plus 1 white guy.

penus

A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

What do you call an asian woman with one leg? By her name.

My computer crashed today I was watching porn.

ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE!? YES I AM, AH! ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE?! The judge did not find the Elton John song worthy of negating the statuary rape charges and sentenced him to nine years in jail.

What's the best time to visit a dentist? Generally every six months or so.

Why was Mrs. Clause mad at Santa Clause? Because he was hanging out with three hoes, Ho, Ho, and Ho

What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

What did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They didn't. She was a blind deaf-mute, there was very little she could do wrong

I'm wet Ew you perv.. Stop thinking like that ! I just took a shower.

A haiku for you Would not provide enough space To say all the nice

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because 7 ate 9.

What dies but was never living? The hopes and dreams of small children.

Brad Fuller!

What would happen if nyan cats crashed with eachother? It would be a great impact, and we'd all be sad.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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