What did the overweight blind kid get for Christmas? His parents died in a tragic car crash and he was left alone, fat and blind to fend for himself

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I bought one of those anti-bullying wristbands, when they first came out. Well, I say bought. I actually stole it from a short, fat ginger kid.

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Why did the farmer's wife leave the farm? Because she was a lesbian.

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Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A: None. Woodchucks have herbivorous diet mainly consisting of wild grasses, berries, as well as agricultural crops when they are available.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A Wii.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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what is a bracket? a bracket

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whats bloody and mingen Scabbaz head

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What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

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What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

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What did the Carbon atom say to the Oxygen atom? Nothing, basic elements are incapable of speech. It requires a culmination of many atoms to form a living human capable of speaking to another human.

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How do you kill an Asian? Poke him with a large fork until hes dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car

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i like my women like i like my coffee without a penis

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Why can't you give a diabetic a cookie? Due to the lack of Insulin produced in the Pancreas, the sudden spike of sugar into the blood stream may send the person into a diabetic coma, which good possibly result in the amputation of a limb.

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how do you kill Lady Gaga? with a gun.

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How do you fit 1000 Jews into a car? You can't. You'd need a much larger vehicle.

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knock knock Who's there? Someone who wants to save you from the shitty dinner your lazy wife made.

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I have a dig bick . . . . . You have a dirty mind.

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Your mom is so stupid she makes stupid people look not stupid.

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When I get aroused I get a solid snake

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I can't hear music. I am a sentence.

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What did Santa call the prostitute? Nothing. Santa isn't real.

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when life givs you lemons, make lesbian porn

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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