Roses are red Violets are blue Actually, no they're not. They're VIOLET. That's why they're called that. If they were blue, they would be called "Blues", or something of a similar nature. Don't be dumb.

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a dinosaur with a large clown hat is walking down the street when he is confronted by an obese monkey human with red hair. I set this up for a good pun, but the one i have is potatoes.

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DESERT

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Why is ms Wolfe mean? Because she is a poop face

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What do you call a guy wearing a white leisure suit? Mister Rourk? No, you call the dud wearing the white duds.

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What doesn't kill you and doesn't make you stronger? Aids

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24

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Your momma is so fat she has an increased risk or cardiac arrest due to obesity. I ridicule her based on the theory that her morbid obesity is due to the fact that she has a diet consisting of large amounts of calories and high fat content and/or she is known to be very sedentary and does not partake in physical exercise. However, if this increase in body fat content is due to genetics I retract my previous statement and wish only the best for her, also, you might want to lower your calorie intake and visit your local gym, lest you succumb to morbid obesity, much like your mother.

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What do you call a Christmas tree with lights on it? A Christmas tree with lights on it.

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A man walked on the street where he saw an other man. The two men said: "Hi!" to each other and walked together down the road. Then one of the men got ran over by a car. The other man said: "ROFL".

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Q:What do you get when you mix a tiger and a panda? A:nothing, its impossible

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Why did the boy want to commit suicide? Because he didn't want to die.

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How do you keep black people from hanging around in your front yard? Hang them in the back..

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa? Poke her Face.

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why was the woman in the kitchen? because societal standards placed her in such a situation

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What's worse than a dog peeing on your new flower garden? A terrorist attack.

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What's something that really sucks? Having a homicidal cat on your chest.

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What is black and white and red all over. A pile of dead zebras

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Why did the buetiful woman marry the homeless man? True love

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Would anyone like to contribute to my slush fund?

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What do you call a medical student who finishes last in his class? Doctor.

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A man tells his wife to leave the kitchen

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The other day I saw this dog. It said woof.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a murderer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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