Q: What is the differenc between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babys? A: I dont have a lamborghini my garage.

Knock knock. Who's there? Docter. Docter who? XDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

A blonde walks into a bar. She says ow

What is black and white and cant get through revolving doors? A zebra with a spear through its head.

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

When my brother was hanging at YOUR cross, he asked "daddy" "Oh father why!" Then lightning struck and the weather went to fuck. Moral: WHAT KIND OF RESPONSE IS THAT YOU PIECE OF SHIT!?

knock knock whos there johovas witness O-0

This is Heading 1

Omg you bought a Prius? Children in Africa are starving and could have used that money to buy food.

How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

Kids are cheering about the confetti at a birthday party, the mom says the twin towers just collapsed.

Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

How do you get a black man out of a tree? Ask him nicely to come down, and if that doesn't work, he will most likely stay up there.

A man walks into a bar, sits down and the bartender comes over and asks him what he wants to drink. The man replies, "Carrot Juice."

ronald wants to join a gym, they tell him to lose 20 pounds before coming back or else.....

frogs are green and grass is greener i just blew up ur mom and ur the cleaner now get to work SLAVE

Just Replying to Brock Facebook request Brock you should know by now that i am at your school talk to me there. Plus i loved the kiss you gave me in science. Now that tested my chemistry. Hehe. Emma Brown xOxOxOxXXXXXoOOOOO

Why was the anti joke funny? because it wasn't funny.

What is black and blue? A pen with reversable ink.

A woman walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Yes ma'am?". She orders a gin and tonic, but the bartender had gave her two without realising, and so she pays for one only. She starts to contemplate whether to tell the bartender about his error or to just leave it and have a free glass of gin and tonic. However as she is a christian, gluttony is a sin, and she already had enough to drink today. However, she feels the need to have a relaxing drink today, because as she was on her job as a receptionist, when a customer tripped on the last step of the stairs behind her and broke his neck, dying instantly, which deeply saddened her. This later led her to indulge on 3 glasses of red wine in the staff room. She finally concludes after a few moments pondering, to not tell the bartender about his error, and pampered herself with two relaxing glasses of gin and tonic. Her dead, mutilated body was later found in the rubble of a car after a head-on collision with a truck.

Dave and Tim walk into a bar. The bartender says to Dave: "What'll it be?" Dave is black.

Why couldn't the elephant ride the bike? Because it didn't have a thumb to ring the bell!

What's worse than losing a contact Having a bloody stool

Why was Susie crying? There was a frog stapled to her face.