Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

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How do Mexicans have sex? They get in bed, and the man puts his dick in his partner's vagina.

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What's the difference between Justin Bieber and R. Kelly? One is an arrogant asshole known for pissing on things, the other is R. Kelly.

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A genie walks into a bar. The bartender asks for three wishes. The genie says "okay". The bartender says "I wish I was the richest person in the world." The genie says "okay." Then He woke up

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What's the easiest way to become filthy rich? There are many ways to earn money. Invest some time into researching the topic.

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whats in common with a rat and an apple? neither of them are a fridge

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what's the difference between a box of dead babies and a corvette? I don't have a corvette in my garage!

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A man walks into a bar. He proceeds to begin his bartending shift.

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whats the difference between G. Bush and a rock? Bush (bull)shits and rock doesn't

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Did you hear the joke about the butter? No.

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What do you call a fat man in a tiny pipe? Stuck.

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Why the monkey fall out the tree? Cause he was dead!

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Black guys shoot. White guys have small penises. Black guys steal. White guys have keep money. Black guys are broke. That's what she said.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems make sense. 5

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Yo mama is so fat , she died of a heart condition

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What happens when you cross a starfish with a dog? Dogs and chickens are from a different phylum, they are genetically incompatible.

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John: Hey Pablo why are you standing outside Home Depot. Pablo: Because I work here.

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What do you call a mulsim that tattles on you for vandilising muslim propaganda Target Practice

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A priest walks into a bakers and asks for a loaf of bread , the baker asks "white or brown" the priest replies "it does not matter Sir I have my bike outside".

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Q: What did the littl boy with cancer get for christmas? A: Nothing, he didnt make it that far.

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Chuck Norris goes to the mars to fight the marshuns he then die's soon after because there is lack of oxegen on mars and theres no marshuns.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust Whats worse than the holocaust? getting raped by a giant scorpion What's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher, Mr. Smith What's worse than getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher Mr. Smith? Snapping your femur bone in half What's worse than snapping your femur bone in half? Birthing a dead baby

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This boy. We shall call him George. George was skating down the street when he passed the market. George stopped and looked in when he saw this SWEET pair of shoes! They were priced for 20 bucks. So George rushed home and went to his dad who was mowing the lawn. "DAD DAD!" "what?" The dad said. "I FOUND THESE SWEET PAIR OF SHOES! Can you lend me 20 bucks?" His dad shook his head and George ran inside the house and went up to his mom who was washing the dishes. "Mom can you lend me 20 bucks for these sweet shoes?" His mom just looked at him funny and said, "No". Angry, George set off upstairs to his sister's room who was on the computer. "Sis can you lend me...." "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!" She slammed the door in his face. George sighed and went to his room. But before he got to his door, he saw a 20 dollar bill on the floor. He picked it up and rushed to the store. Once he got the shoes he ran back home to his dad. "Dad DAD! Look at these.." He stopped and saw his dad that was under the lawnmower dead. George shrugged and went inside to his mom. "Mom mom! Look at these...." He stopped and saw that his mom was stuffed in the dishwasher, dead. George sighed and ran upstairs to show his sis. "Hey sis look at...." She was found with her head in the computer screen, dead. So George sighed and walked down to the living room. He plumped on the couch and wondered about how his family died. Then there was a knock on the door. George hesitated. It knocked again. He got up and went to the door. Opened it and out stood a penguin. He stared at the penguin. "What do you want?!" The penguin stared back. What did he say?????? Nothing penguins can't talk.

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If strippers are exotic dancers then drug dealers are to exotic pharmacists.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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