You have now entered Automatic Breathing Mode

Is your refrigerator running? No. That is highly improbable because a refrigerator has no arms or legs, also a refrigerator is not a human being, or alive in any manor and therefor cannot be moved with out an external force acted upon it.

What's beauitful and disgusting at the same time? Menstration. Jk it's just disgusting.

Why couldn't the colorblind boy play Twister with his friends? He was a quadriplegic.

Knock knock. Who’s there? Your son. Your son who? DAD WHY CAN’T YOU ACCEPT THE FACT THAT I AM GAY!

How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagon? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back.... and that's it because the holocaust never happened.

You know how I felt about Nero, no way id ever date anyone but you, back then that is. Fine I will come along, I bet you left the base at "point zero" without the information he left, you have not changed a bit Seth, always too impulsive for your own good, but Nero was always like that and that, turned out, well damn. Tell me first, if you come get me, how much have you really changed mentally from the last time we met? You sincerely sound like a psychopath and I could use a shoulder to cry on rather than be escorted to some sick torture dungeon thing. I gather you are not far away, could you please get over here asap? I do not care about more than the standard code anymore, you have not changed much, except you are a deranged psychopath now, I get it, in your place I think id do the same, I have no idea how bad Nero was doing when you found him, and I sure as hell dont want to know.

Your momma's so fat; She has a constant sense of insecurity due to the instability in her relationships caused by her involuntary obesity.

What's black, white, and red all over? A zebra that's been brutally cut open.

Why was the broom late? Cause he overSWEPT!!! ahahahahahaha!

What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

What did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? Get off the roof.

Why did Kelliintheraw get punched in the face? Because she is a dumbass

What did the black kid get for christmas? A wii with duel contollers and a 2 year insurance for it incase it gets robbed or damaged

Why cant jonny walk? He has no legs.

roses are red. violets are violet...

whats it called when a pimp slaps a ho? RESPECT

Why did the dinosaurs die out? Because you touch yourself at night.

Q: what did the man with a broken jaw say? A: nnamkkiuuiriwojjkmgfmls!!!!

Whats more painful than falling onto a sharp stone? Suffering the loss of your mother and newborn brother in a tragic car accident on your birthday.

Once upon a time there was a small poor boy in a small German village. Her was name Smalls. Later he found out that he had to go back to Virginia because of their family then she got milk and went to the play that night like he was planning, and it was probably a problem with the clutch or transmission. It was fine because Smalls was 64 years old.

A man walked into a bar Ouch.

How did Jane fall off the swing? Jane had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Jane.

I forgot how to throw a boomerang and then it came back to me.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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