Why did the wee boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck.

Don't worry, I'm not as random as you think I salad

Mr Jones, we're sending you to a mental health clinic

rose's are red, bananas are yellow, yo mama's so fat she jiggles like jello

Roses are red Violets are violet Don't know why people are saying they're blue

Knock Knock Who's There? The police- we are sorry to inform you that your wife and only child was killed in a brutal car accident earlier this evening, We offer our condolences.

Knock Knock ************************** No-one's home

Roses are red Violets are blue I forgot to go to the bathroom

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

Why doesn't a chicken wear pants? Because, there are no tailors in the area who make pants suitable for chickens to wear.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says, "It is quite hot in here." This is a lie. Neither of the muffins spoke because in reality, Muffins are not only inanimate objects, they are not humans, and therefore they do not have the ability to speak in a comprehensible language.

your dad's gay. just let that sink in.

A British man walks into a bar. He has to get stitches.

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there was a red light and it was his turn to cross.

How do you teach a black guy to swim? You sign him up for swimming lessons.

Knock knock Go fuck yourself

A girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

What would you do if the house you're sitting in now exploded? Nothing really, you would have died a horrible death.

1: What do you call your car door when it's opened slightly? 2: I don't know. What? 1: Ajar! 2: A jar? 1: No. Ajar. 2: But it's a door. 1: Just forget it.

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Our experimental treatment for Anterograde amnesia has failed. I will inform your family.

Lets Go Lakers!

roses are red. vilets are blue. I'm getting hungry. make me some food...bitch.

Why did the man wear his jacket because he was cold

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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