What's funnier than cancer? Just about anything. There's nothing funny about terminal illnesses.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? There aren't pineapples in the ocean.

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Im Black And I Will Beat You Children At Checkers,They Can Be Red

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What did the man get when he returned from Africa? AIDS

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What would Steve Jobs be doing today if he were alive? Dying.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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what do you call a black man wearing a makeup? A clown

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Q: what did the white man say to the black man? A: hi

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How do you kill a blonde? Cut off the bloodflow to their vital organs.

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why was the frog sad..... because it had a science lesson with the year 10s about the insides of animals

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There was a black and a mexican man in a car. Who was driving? None of them; it was the police driving.

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a burglar walks in a house the alarm goes off and the police come

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. The man leaves in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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What is the difference between a mexican and a bench? One is living, one is not.

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Yo' Momma is so fat she weighs a lot!

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Why did the waiter lose his job? Because he was a fish

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Q: why do english soldiers have red coats? A: to cover the blood stains, so they can still lead their platoons when they are shot. why else?

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Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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If there are 2 narwhals and two apples, why is each of the narwhals happy? Because each is a narwhal.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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An Asian man, a black man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They all buy the same drink, are charged the same price and say " We are all equal! " They then continue on with their days normaly.

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Hi

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If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Depends. Some are vegetarians or vegans, while most eat a mixture of vegetables and meat.

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Why didn't the Alzheimers patient put on her shoes? She didn't leave the elderly home that day, thus taking away the need to put on shoes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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