Little kids wear superman underwear. Superman wears Chuck Norris underwear.

What happens when you put the batteries in BACKWARDS in the Energizer Bunny? Nothing. Nothing happens when you insert batteries backwards

Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

I bought one of those anti-bullying wristbands, when they first came out. Well, I say bought. I actually stole it from a short, fat ginger kid.

What does the name Joe mean? Joe Mama! Egit

Why was the blonde crying? She had just been raped by a 10-foot praying mantis.

What's black, blue and smells like fish? A dead penguin.

When life gives you melons, you're dyslexic.

why did the man fall off his bike? He got shot by the navy seals, He was a highly decorated terrorist.

Yeah sure, you have "absolutely... ...No... ...Reason..." to... Fucking... use... This... place... at... all... But you seem to be here all the fucking time, what fucking sense does that make? That is not the matter at all fagface! Your fucking goons assaulting me because "I stole one of your aliases?" I was born Nero and will die fucking Nero, not Nerometal, not Nero of Neronism, just Nero your friendly rapist! Yeah Ill give you my fucking social info, so you... and... your... excessive... use... of... this shit... can... send... your ...fucking assholes to finish the job! Listen bitch! I am a writer! And your faggots stabbed off like half of my eyeball! I don't give a damn about this site, I want your fucking assholes to stop seeking me out in person! Hell, give me your social info, so we can "make a fucking settlement" Where I break off your head and shit down your neck!

Your mother is so overweight that she decided to have liposuction and then proceeded to live a wonderful life.

A blonde and a brunette nearly fell off a cliff and were hanging on for dear life. The brunette found the strength to climb back onto the ledge. The blonde was impressed and had muscular dystrophy so she lost the strength to hold on any longer and fell to her death.

roses are red violets are blue i have candy im about to rape you

Two Iranians walk into an airport They show their passports and proceed to fly to their home in Minnesota

a white man, a black man, a chinese man and a mexican man stand at the edge of a roof. the chinese man stands at the edge and says "this is for ma people" and jumps off. then the mexican stands at the edge of the roof and says "this is for my people" and jumps off. finally, the black man stands at the edge of the roof and shouts "this is for my people!" and throws the white man off. The End XD

Breast cancer.

What's the difference between Timmy and a car? Timmy can be brutally murdered.

Why did the blond wreak her car? She stayed up a very long time studying for her mid-term exam, And therefore, was not as attentive to the flow of traffic.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pale of water jack fell down and broke his neck and he was dead... The End

Why did the woman lie down? She was dead

how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

roses are red, violets are blue, apparently you are blind or else I wouldn't be telling this to you.

Your mother is so fat that when she jumps into a pool, she displaces a proportionately larger amount of water than people with normal body mass indexes or BMI

What did the rapper Proof say when he got in a fight? Nothing, Proof is dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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