What do you do when life hands you lemons? Go home, look for the ingredients on which to make proper, delicious lemonade. Afterward, I would go in the front yard, make a stand, then make a sign that says $1.00 lemonade. Then you know make millions on your master-mind plan that no one else ever thought of.

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A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

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why did ryan go to bed? because he is a growing boy and need it to keep in line for his study's i lied about him sleeping hes dead he was abducted

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What do you call five white guys sitting on a bench? the NBA

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Dyslexics are teople poo

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If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? A question and answering session of information used to test knowledge of a specific idea or person.

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A man walks into a bar. He then takes a step back and notices that his head hurts.

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The teacher hands out tests to the students and some of the students say to the teacher "what does 'no grade' mean?" The teacher responds, "Oh I need to grade them still.")

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How do you get a black man down from a tree? If the man cannot climb down himself, perhaps call the fire department.

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Why did the little boy drop his lollipop? He got hit by a car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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what do you call a bee that makes milk? A BOObee

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Q: Why were the chicken and the cow friends? A: Because they shared common interests.

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Know what would be awkward, if a GPS told a gay guy to get straight.

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What did the parrot say to the dumb man? Nothing

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How did the black kid apply for college? The Common App. Duhh

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why did kyle and jake have sex? Because they were gay.

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why did billy fall down? Because he is mentaly retarted and was just plain stupid.

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How does a man with no arms and legs get to your door. After asking his name please help us out with this question

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What's worse than hell? I would say the Holocaust, but they're both the same for the Jews.

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I like playing in the balls. I like balls.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? THE CHICKEN!

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A doctor walks into a bar, he stumbles backwards as he is taking his coat of, and the barman chuckles.

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Why did the jewish plumber commit suicide? After years abuse from his alcoholic father and rich sibling, he finally snapped and killed himself on his birthday after nobody told him happy birthday.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops