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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? I don't know. He couldn't open it.

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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What is worse than finding an Apple in your Worm? Watching your dog jumping of a cliff

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What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? Nothing. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said objects are, are in no way capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

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Whats better than winning gold at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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The Barackness Monster

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What did the Mexican get for christmas? Nothing, he was caught sneaking over the border in November.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

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i just got all five seasons of big bang theory in the mail for xmas... i'm divorcing my wife.

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How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven stabbed his mother.

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One time I masturbated by myself

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Susan boyle has a belly button, Simon has a belly button, Because its only normal.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not having enough money to buy an apple.

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What did the dog say to the other dog? Woof.

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When life gives you lemons.... Impossible life is not a person nor a dispenser of lemons.

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knock knock Labrinth come in

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A girl asked for lip balm. She put some on and her lips exploded.

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Why did steve cry? Because he got punched.

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whats worse then having sex with a blonde? having sex with a cactus

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what do you call a joke that makes no sense? a joke that makes no sense

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What's worse than a Holocaust in your apple? What.

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we should name the next hurricane alex rodriguez so it dosent hit any thing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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