You're at a funeral & your phone goes off and the ringtone is dead and gone

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Darude- Sandstorm

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"Free to play" Play free "right now"

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

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What did one socially awkward kid say to another socially awkward kid? Nothing

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When life hands you lemons... do not squeeze them, for juice may squirt into your eye, causing severe pain.

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Where's my baby??

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That's what she didn't say

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whats worse than dying alone? dying with a boner.

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falling didnt make the difference

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Roses are red Violets are tits I like tits Tits

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Stephen Hawkings viewed porn as a child

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven.

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Two women are sitting next to each other in a bar minding their own business.

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Why did the prostitute survive the gunshot? She was wearing a bulletproff vest.

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what does the homeless man do when he gets home? nothing, he's homeless

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What's similar between my butthole and shampoo? They both smell good, except for by butthole.

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You're momma's so fat..Oh wait she's not.

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School

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Answer The Following!! Q: How Do You Kill Bee?? Q: What Do You Call A Bee Who Live In America?? Q: Why Don't You Give Elsa A Balloon??

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what the difference between matthew and a retard? The retard can do math

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When life gives you oranges, hit kidswith 'em.

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A blind was staring at a girls ass. Her boyfriend promptly bludgeoned the man unaware of his illness.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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