Why do elephants have such big ears? So they can hear really well.

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I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I'm allergic to peanuts. DAMIT

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What did the polar bear say when he walked into a sauna? Absolutely nothing because he was a polar bear. I mean seriously, did I even have to ask? Everyone should know that a polar bear is an animal and he wouldn't say anything. If he did it would most likely be a growl or a roar. If you believed that he would have said something you obviously didn't pass the first grade. I finish with the fact that a polar bear would not survive in a sauna because they are accustomed to cold climate. I guess this was just a waste of time.

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What is yellow and corny? Corn.

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why did timmy die he was shot in the head by terrorists

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"Whats your favorite number?" "9." "Is it because thats your jersey number." "Thats my jersey number?"

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven murdered sixes wife and kids and said he was next.

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a terrorist walks into a bank and says "gimme all the money or ill kill you" the bank owner said you and what army the terrorist said this army and no one came in buuuut he opened hi jacket and there was a bomb straped to him then he exploded it Buuuuuuut in hell he thinks hang on a minute i didn't get my money oh for goodness sake Buuuuuuuuuuut in heaven the bank man said i still live in a wonderfull place and anywhay we had no money left and i was going to suiside soooooooooooooooooooooooo you done me a favour and if i would of suiside i could of gone to hell but you killed me so i edidnt go to hell buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut you did lol by the way i just wasted your time

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Q. why are black people so good at sports? A. Hardwork and dedication.

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street he gets hit by an airplane

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Why did the black man cry? He was grieving the death of his brother C.D

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yous are all f u c k i n g dumb like rat kavanagh

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Rishi is a funny guy, well he thinks he is. true story.

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if a man is alone in the forest, and there are no women around to hear him...........is he still wrong?

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...IIITS... :) SMILEY :( AND MADDY THE HORSEHEAD SHOW ITS :) SMILEY :( AND MADDY THE HORSEHEAD SHOW! :) YAY! :(SHADDAP YUUU! Episode one... The waiting for the wait!

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Whats up with your nan? Copious amounts of lsd

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what is blue and fluffy, a blue fluff. what is red and fluffy, a polar bear wiped in red paint. you probably should not have done that because now the polar bear is chasing after you.

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Q: What's wrong with being gay A: Nothing is wrong with anybody because we're all human

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A man is on a date. His philandering causes a bitter divorce.

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What do you call a medical student who finishes last in his class? Doctor.

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Why did the banana explode? Because it was a grenade!

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What did the little boy ask for for Christmas? A new brain, as he has a malignant tumor, he died.

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red OH SH*T MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!!!!!

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What's the difference in a red sports car and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a red sports car in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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