Why won't lance Armstrong survive 2012 Because he has cancer

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What moos like a cow? Another cow

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A man walks in on his wife blowing Bubbles. Two weeks later they are divorced.

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Doctor, I am afraid of getting sexually abused. Hmm, sounds serious, take off all your clothes so we can get a proper look.

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These are some questions you should never ask on a first date: When you wipe do you throw your toilet tissue in the toilet or on a trash can? Do you smell your hands after you wipe? Do you you ever look down when you take a dump and see it come out? Have you ever picked your butt and then picked your nose with the same finger?

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Why was the Cubs fan sad? His wife just left him.

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What do Jews and Sloths have in common? They are both Mammals.

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like a someboyyyyyyyyyyyy

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The president, Oprah and Abraham Lincoln are sitting in a crashing airplane. lol

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car, Robin.

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What is the worst gift a child can get? a gift

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Dogs taste better in stews.

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What did the black man say to the asian? Hey.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Don't you sometime just want to chop of your toes and stomp around to prove to the so called 'experts' that it is possible for a person to walk without toes? . . . . . . me neither

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What's fourteen inches long and purple and can make a woman scream all night? crib death

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Are you gay? No. Ok.

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If the best things in life are free, whats the hardest things in life? Death.

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3.14159365358979323846264

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he f**king felt like it!

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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'Knock Knock' 'Who's there?' 'My name is Boo, I'm sorry,I think I was given the wrong address, I'll be on my way now' Boo walks away from the unsuspecting person's front door and goes to the next house along in the hope of finding the house he was originally searching for.

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two men walked into a bar the last one ducked

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Whats funnier than watching the kid next to you on the computer? Nothing because he is still trying to figure out that i unplugged his mouse!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops