what's black and white? everything. i'm a dog

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Why did the cow say moo? Because all cows say moo

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, killed 6's family and made him watch...

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Why was the women's basketball player laughed at. The slippery floor caused her to stumble and fall.

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So there are three black people on a plane. The pilot comes over the intercom and says "Wow wow wow wait a second... ...why are there only three people on this plane? This is a commercial flight"

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How do you kill two birds with one stone. You don't its not humanly possible because birds cannot be killed with rocks.

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Hey you wanna hear a joke? Sure! Well first, do you want part of my sandwich? No thanks.........Are you going to tell your joke? Joke? Um sure. I didn't know I was telling one. Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Would you like part of my sandwich?

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, he can't come anyway.

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a white man, a black man, a chinese man and a mexican man stand at the edge of a roof. the chinese man stands at the edge and says "this is for ma people" and jumps off. then the mexican stands at the edge of the roof and says "this is for my people" and jumps off. finally, the black man stands at the edge of the roof and shouts "this is for my people!" and throws the white man off. The End XD

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Q. What is small, ugly and severely asthmatic? A. My younger brother. Jimmy.

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Why Did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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Feeling that your friends do not listen to your insightful conversations? BUY A PARROT! Teach it to say "Uhuh", and "Ahah", and "Dats coo!" NOW YOU CAN BE COMPLETELY APRECIATED BY A FUCKING BIRD THAT DOES NOT KNOW WHAT YOU ARE SAYING... ...BUT IS IT... APPRECIATING IT? DUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN! MYSTERY!

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How many pancakes does it take to fill up a doghouse? None, because ice cream doesn't have bones.

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A man walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic beverage. The bartender serves him and inquires about the man's day. The man says nothing, drinks his beverage, pays his tab and walks out.

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How does a girl with no arms swing on the swing? She doesn't, she has no arms.

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? How ever many seats happen to be available.

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It's Christmas Eve and your entire family is gone for 12 hours to by you presents. What will you do while there gone? By the time you figured out what you will do you will hear a knock at your door. It's the police they are here to tell you your entire family was murdered during a shooting at the mall. The sad part is you will not receive your NEW Beats, your Xbox 1, or your make up.

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A co-pilot

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what do u say when u see your tv floating in the middle of the night? drop it n*****

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A man goes and buys a head of cabbage. The cabbage had a worm in it. When the man saw the worm, he threw out the cabbage and bought a new one the next time he went to the grocery store.

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What Batman Said to Robin before getting into the car? I'll drive.

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What happened when the man killed a baby? He was captured by the authorities and sentenced to life in prison.

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Yo mama so stupid that she was tested and found to be mentally retarded.

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Q. What was the the cancer's patients favorite song? A. Radioactive

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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