What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

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What is red, blue, green, and pink, tie died, and alive? Nothing.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have AIDS we're dying together

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Your mom is so fat, it is unlikely that she will be able to survive the month without experimental liposuction and heart surgery, and even then her outlook is bleak. I am so sorry.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Why couldn't the mexican feed his family? Because a large percent of mexican immigrants in the United States do not have jobs due to dicrimination against illegal immigrants crossing the soutern border, thus rendering them more vunerable to unemployment is that is vastly present in the United States.

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Your boat breaks down on the highway. How many squirrels does it take to eat a bannana? Squirrels do not eat bannanas but it would probably take a monkey 1.5 milliseconds.

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What do you call a black person on a bike? A cyclist.

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How Many Blondes does it take to open a fridge. 1 Because most blondes are smart and can open fridges.

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Did u hear what happened to that man with no arms and no legs who tried to play water polo? No, what happened He drowned....

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What do giant panda bears eat? giant bamboo

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Hey dude, wanna come with me!!!! Sure, where? ON YOUR FACE!!!!!! -_- ........ok sure why not

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What do you do with a dead black man? Respect his final wishes and provide him with proper funeral services.

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar. <>

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Corn Muffins

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Whats white and bad for your teeth? A refridgerator

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Eat My Food!!! Joking I dont have any food

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Whats black, yellow and white? my wives

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Why did the lightbulb go out? It was on too long

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What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you haven't already said twice.

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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whats worse than biting your apple and finding a worm? WWII.

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What did the banker say to the other banker? We're both bankers!

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What's similar about a fish and an eagle? They can both fly, except for the fish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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