Why did the girl fall off the swing Because she had no arms

Why did someone see a penguin walking in the desert? They were dreaming, because Penguins waddle and live in the Arctic.

Q: Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip to England? A: She found out Big Ben was only a clock

What do you call a black person riding a bicycle? A black person riding a bicycle.

Q. If the early bird gets the worm, what does the early worm get? A. Eaten...

Knock, Knock Who's There? (Silence) Wondering who was there, the man opened the door, to find a baby in a basket in front of him.

An Irish man walks into his home and orders a drink.

Whats cooler than cool? Ice Cold.

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 for violence and mild nudity.

How many blind men does it take to change a light bulb?

Do you want to hear a funny joke? Me too.

Roses are red, violetes are blue, Your monkey sucks.

Why did the man feel so guilty after having sex...... He found out He was a tranny

What worse than rain Osama Bin Laden

A man goes into a bar. What are mangos doing in a bar?

Roses are red, violets are blue a face like yours belongs in a zoo. Don't you worry I'll be there too, not in the cage but laughing at you.

[Insert hurtful, yet spontaneous comment here.]

Knock Knock Who's There? Jerry Jerry Who? Jerry Sandusky, I've come to rape your kids.

whats worse tan loosing checkers getting lit on fire

Why couldn't Mike answer the phone on time? On his way to the phone he was shot and killed.

the little pink lady joke: There once was a little pink lady who lived in a little pink house. One day, she was in her little pink bed when her little pink doorbell rang. So she gets out of her little pink bed, puts on her little pink slippers, crosses her little pink room, openes her little pink door, goes down her little pink hallway, goes down her little pink stairs, and to her little pink door. She openes her little pink door, and there is a postman standing on her little pink mat. The postman says: "Does Mr Green live here?" The little pink lady said: "No." So she closes her little pink door, goes back up her little pink staircase, down her little pink corridor, into her little pink room, takes off her little pink slippers and hops into her little pink bed. Then her little pink doorbell rings again. So she gets out of her little pink bed, puts on her little pink slippers, crosses her little pink room, openes her little pink door, goes down her little pink hallway, goes down her little pink stairs, and to her little pink door. She openes her little pink door, and there is a postman standing on her little pink mat. The postman says: "Does Mr White live here?" The little pink lady said: "No." So she closes her little pink door, goes back up her little pink staircase, down her little pink corridor, into her little pink room, takes off her little pink slippers and hops into her little pink bed. And then her little pink doorbell rings again. So she gets out of her little pink bed, puts on her little pink slippers, crosses her little pink room, openes her little pink door, goes down her little pink hallway, goes down her little pink stairs, and to her little pink door. She openes her little pink door, and there is a postman standing on her little pink mat. The postman says: "Does Mr Brown live here?" The little pink lady said: "No." So she closes her little pink door, goes back up her little pink staircase, down her little pink corridor, into her little pink room, takes off her little pink slippers and hops into her little pink bed. Finally, its breakfast time, so the little pink lady gets out of her little pink bed, puts on her little pink slippers, goes out of her little pink room and to her little pink kitchen. Inside, there are 3 men. 2 are eating cheerios, 1 is eating an apple. This proves that cheerios are more popular than apples!

Who likes to be fisted? Sock puppets.

What is the best kind of necro? Dead necro.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...