a man made a beautiful colorful picture and hit print. the printer then grew a mind of its own and did the most horriffic and evil thing ever; he printed it in black and white.

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Knock Knock ? Whose's there ? The person you should be opening the door for The person you should be opening the door for who? Oh my god Frank open the goddamn door

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Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got hitted by a drunken driver and died last week, when he was cycling to school.

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Q: What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: A funeral.

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What is white on the inside and red on the outside? An apple.

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Two men go hunting and one has a sudden heart attack. The other man calls 911 and immediately tells the operator his location and the nature of the emergency. Rescue workers arrive on the scene in a timely manner and the man makes a full recovery.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One of them you crack open with a sledgehammer and feast upon, and the other is a dead baby.

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Why did the little girl cry? Because she saw her future.

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Do you like impressions? Why? That's Socrates

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Bob.

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Your Mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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so 3 guys walk into a bar.....the 4th one ducks

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What's more depressing than watching a worm watching to worms

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Why do black people have the whitest teeth? Because they brush regularly.

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who did the strait guy marry? a woman

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Q: what do u call a hotdog that's not cooked? A:a raw hot dog

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Why are kenyans so fast? Because due to evolutionary changes, people from that area of the world have evolved to have superior muscle builds to sprint, hence giving them a natural advantage against an equally trained athlete form another part of the world with an equal skill level

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Why was the little girl crying? Her father has been abusing her and her mother for a year now.

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Your mom is so fat, that when she stepped on the scale she was disappointed with the number that appeared.

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sit on your hand until it goes numb and then touch yourself.

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Why did the condom drive over his pet mac and cheese? Because his uncle was not george bush.

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So joe diragi walks out of a gay bar...

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what do you call a 19th century steam train driver ? i dont know , depends what his mother named him

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose... But you cannot be a dinosaur!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops